Volume II: Filmography

"CLARISSA'S" CHARMING CALF

(Falstaff)

November 4, 1915 (Thursday)

Length: 1 reel (1,006 feet)

Character: Comedy

Scenario: Lloyd F. Lonergan

Cast: Arthur Cunningham ("Clarissa"), Claude Cooper, Joe Burke, Bert Delaney, Lawrence Swinburne

Note: Some accounts omitted the quotation marks around Clarissa's in the film title.

SYNOPSIS, The Moving Picture World, November 27, 1915:

"Clarissa was one of the belles of Cherry Pit Siding. She could cook and plough, and all the young farmers admired her. She ignored them, however, and finally accepted the attentions of Josh Jigger, a politician, who was made fire chief, a position which pays $20 per month. At the annual firemen's ball there was an exciting contest for 'the most popular young lady,' and Josh, because of his political ability and authority, so fixed things that Clarissa won the first and only prize, a beautiful calf, donated by a farmer. Josh Jiggers thought he was a twentieth century Rembrandt. Clarissa agreed with him, and with her pet posed for a painting to be known as 'Clarissa's Charming Calf.'

"Unfortunately for the lovers they were seen by Omar Commerstein, the New York variety manager, and he yearned for Clarissa's presence as a roof-garden attraction. He offered her a fabulous salary, but she spurned it. Omar remonstrated, then tried to drag her off, but Josh Jiggers sprang to her aid and the villain departed. Omar was a persistent man. He lured the fire chief away by turning in a false alarm of fire, and then when the girl was alone with her calf, he seized her and carried her off to a handcar he had waiting on the railroad tracks nearby. But the wicked manager reckoned without the calf. It was an intelligent animal, and he hastened off to [sic] and Josh Jiggers, meeting him on the way to the fire. The chief later declared that the calf's frightened bleats told him what had happened. Anyway, they did not go to the fire, but followed the calf which led them to the railroad tracks. There they were just in time to see the unfortunate Clarissa being borne away on the handcar.

"The firemen were too far away to extend aid. Clarissa had with her a bottle of liquid soap with which she had intended to give the calf a bath. Clarissa knew that if railroad tracks are soaped, engines cannot go ahead. Unnoticed by her enemies she soaped the tracks ahead of the handcar. The vehicle stopped, then as the grade was steep it began to slip back, going faster and faster. Josh Jigger saw that the car was returning and rejoiced. The Cherry Pit Siding firemen hooked up to a convenient hydrant, and as the handcar came back to them, the villainous manager and his confederates were hurled from the handcar by well-directed streams of water. Clarissa was restored to her lover, and they were married. This was many years ago. Now Clarissa often tells the story to her children."

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