The story
“Among his neighbors Henry Perkins was regarded as a human incarnation of the Dove of Peace. He hated strife, and always tried to smile, no matter how unhappy he was. As usually happens in a case like this, Henry Perkins’ domestic existence was one of domestic warfare. His wife had a high-geared tongue, and Henry’s sister, who lived with them, could also talk like a house afire. One day he disappeared, leaving a note to his wife in which he said: ‘I cannot stop the fighting in my own home, so I am going abroad to stop the war in Europe.’ Henry went away with one of his pals, a businessman who claimed he had been ruined by the war. They traveled in Henry’s Ford car, all the way from Jacksonville, Fla., to New York, picking up enroute a tramp whom they ran over. To prevent him from suing for damages, they offered him a free trip to Europe, but the prospects of the trip looked dubious when they lost their car through a crack in a New York sidewalk.
“Then happened what at the time they thought was good luck. They met a kindly sailor man, who offered them a free trip to Europe. He told them it would be necessary to stow them away. The kindly sailor, as it later developed, was a fraud. His ship was short-handed, and the unfortunate peace advocates found that they were compelled to work their passage. Worse than that, the ship did not go to Europe, but returned to Jacksonville, their home town. Henry’s wife was waiting at the dock. Much to Henry’s surprise, she put all the blame on the others, and vengefully horsewhipped them, then led Henry back to his happy home. Perkins never again attempted to interfere with the war in Europe. He decided that the best thing to do was to remain at his own fireside.”
Summary from Reel Life · 12 February 1916
